What Are Those Sad Sweet Moments

that we are compelled to experience

without conscious choice or preparation?


That day I discovered I was capable was one:

stained sheets to be quickly hidden, and raw

exhilaration warring with a deep regret

to find a preoccupation so engrossing


I no longer could attend to toys and games.

Reluctantly I gave them up to focus on myself,

Until another shift ushered in uncertain voice,

rough cheeks, and marred complexion.


I became reclusive, sullen, mute, and

solitary, uncertain in every way,

where every step might court disaster,

every movement, embarrassment,


every moment, some unrequited love.